“While there are the occasional ‘Samanthas’ [of ] among us, for the vast majority of females, sex creates an emotional connection to the other person,” explains Smith.“Before that first kiss, imagine you see him tomorrow holding hands on the quad with another co-ed.What’s harder to see, however, are the reasons why a hook-up might not be such a great idea after all. Smith, president of Mannersmith Etiquette Counseling, says. There are plenty of reasons to opt for a cold shower or battery-operated romance instead.” Before you dive headfirst into a hook-up, consider these 5 reasons why you should think twice. You’re Close Friends If the two of you have a solid history together, think twice before hooking up.“Friends with benefits sounds like a foolproof plan. You are feeling lonely [and] he is game for a go; why not? While friendship can definitely lead to a great relationship, if you’re just looking for something casual, it’s not worth risking what the two of you already have in the name of a fling.“I was mad [that] he blew off our Skype dates and wouldn’t answer his phone, and thought this would be a way of getting his attention.” Smith explains: “Women use sex to feel loved.Hook-ups are not a sign of a confident gal with good self-esteem.” Instead of hooking up with someone else to calm your anger or heartbrokenness, consider having a cozy night in with some girlfriends, wallowing in chick flicks, or even taking a weekend at home if you live close enough and need some TLC from mom.“Even if you think you're being nice and doing a lovestruck guy a favor by hooking up with him, it’s really just going to cause further trouble for both of you if you're not into the hook-up,” says Gabbie. He’s Forcing You Into It You wouldn’t stick it out in an abusive relationship, so why put up with an abusive partner in a hook-up or FWB scenario?
Any guy who tries to intimidate you, threatens you into starting something, tells you that you “owe” him something, or demonstrates other emotionally or physically unhealthy behavior is bad news. when a guy shows you who he is, believe him the first time! As difficult as it may be, it’s a good idea to think twice, and consider if any of these reasons (or ones unique to your situation) serve as a reason to avoid hooking up, no matter how tempting the guy may be.“Slow down and ask yourself why you are so ready to jump into bed with a stranger,” says Smith. Then flirt the night away, get his number, and start with an afternoon date which can evolve into a dinner date, and then turn up the heat after you have known him for a number of hours rather than a number of minutes.” While too much history can be a definite turn-off when deciding whether or not to hook up with someone, not knowing enough about what a person is like outside of the situation you just met them in is also something that should give you pause.Slow things down a little and check with other friends or classmates who might know more about him.Sydney is a junior double majoring in Media and Cultural Studies and Political Science at Macalester College in St.Paul, Minn., a short trip away from Minneapolis, her hometown.